I’m realizing just how good God is…and how patient He is with me! He has been showing me that I had been looking for contentment and happiness in other things above Him. He has been gently directing me back to looking to Him for my truest happiness. And man, it’s so wonderful to have my happiness, contentment and worth coming from Him! It wasn’t that I was wandering away from Him, it was just that my supposed happiness was based on my interpretation of God’s will for my life – not me being submitted to God’s sovereign master plan for my life in everything.
A few weeks ago it really came to a head, I was questioning why God was allowing certain things to happen in my life…from what I thought were really close friends not wanting to have anything to do with me, to my Dad leaving my Mother after 25 years of marriage – I mean this doesn’t happen to people that have been missionaries and from a man I thought was a Christian does it? (I’m still praying that God will work a miracle and restore things). Life hasn’t been going according to how I wanted it to go…
However after lots of prayer, lots of tears, heartache and a fair bit of questioning God’s wisdom, He has been patiently showing me that despite everything, He is leading in my life. The trials that I’m going through at the moment are part of His master plan for my life, and He wants me to trust Him with it. God writing through His prophet Jeremiah says, “I know the plans that I have for you, declares the LORD. They are plans for peace and not disaster, plans to give you a future filled with hope.” (Jeremiah 29:11). There are some things that God hasn’t given me answers on yet, but looking back at my life I can clearly see His direction – and that gives me courage to trust Him and commit my future direction to Him, because He so far has never made a mistake!
I’m excited to say that I’m content with God’s plan for my life – and even though I can’t see all of it, I know that it will be good…because He is good! I feel that I’m starting to understand what Paul meant writing to Timothy when he said that, “godliness with contentment is great gain” because the joy that comes in total surrender to God’s leading in everything is wonderful – and that is great gain! It really struck home yesterday (Sabbath), when a group of us were singing some older songs – from hymn books like Christ in Song. We sang a song called “Beautiful Flowers” – it’s a great song…though like a lot of older songs goes quite high, and while singing the second last verse I hit a high note and cracked up laughing – I was laughing so hard the tears came 
and I felt such joy in my heart! Then I felt the Holy Spirit speak to me and say, “you’re content aren’t you?”. And I realized that I’ve let go, all the plans I had made back in Australia before I left I’ve given to God, I’m trusting Him with all of my life, not just the parts I want to give to Him…and man alive, it feels good! 